Download Adult children: the secrets of dysfunctional families by John C. Friel Ph.D., Linda D. Friel M.A. PDF

By John C. Friel Ph.D., Linda D. Friel M.A.

It truly is anticipated that as many as 34 million humans grew up in alcoholic houses. yet what concerning the remainder of us? What approximately households that had no alcoholism, yet did have perfectionism, workaholism, compulsive overeating, intimacy difficulties, melancholy, difficulties in expressing emotions, plus all of the different character features which can produce a family members process very like an alcoholic one? numerous hundreds of thousands people fight with most of these dysfunctions each day, and until eventually very lately we struggled on my own. Pulling jointly either conception and scientific perform, John and Linda Friel supply a readable rationalization of what occurred to us and the way we will rectify it.

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We see a police car and feel like we've done something wrong. 48. We sacrifice our dignity for false security. Page 21 49. We demand love and rarely get it. 50. We wish for things instead of going out and getting what we want or need. 51. We hope for the best, expect the worst and never enjoy the moment. 52. We feel like the rest of the human race was put here to make us feel intensely uncomfortable while eating at a restaurant alone. 53. ", but unlike Clara Pellet in the TV commercial, we aren't getting paid to ask.

Many of us are adult children of alcoholic parents who fit the characteristics listed in Janet Woititz' bestselling book Adult Children of Alcoholics (Woititz, 1983). Or we are women or men who "love" too much, as described by Robin Norwood (Norwood, 1985). As Terry Kellogg (1986) states: many of us are not just the victims of alcoholics or child abusers or spouse beaters, many of us become alcoholics, child abusers and spouse beaters ourselves whether we are male or female. As adult children of dysfunctional families we operate in a world of extremes always seeking that healthy balance, the Golden Mean, but always seeming to fall short the mark.

The Rabbit 149 Part IV Beneath The Iceberg 153 16. A General Model of Adult Children and Co-dependency 155 Part V Recovering: What Do I Do Now? 167 17. Uncovering and Admitting 169 18. Working a Program 175 19. A Word About Healing and Spirituality 185 Postlude 20. Kiss Your Monster on the Nose 191 References/Bibliography 195 Appendix 197 Page 1 PART I ADULT CHILDREN Its inhabitants are, as the man once said, "Whores, pimps, gamblers and sons of bitches, by which he meant everybody. Had the man looked through another peephole he might have said, "Saints and angels and martyrs and holy men," and he would have meant the same thing.

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